


My Dear Watson

by Lightofonesoul



Category: Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms, Sherlock Holmes - Arthur Conan Doyle
Genre: Alternate Universe - Victorian, Holmes and Watson, Johnlock - Freeform, Light Angst, M/M, POV First Person, Period-Typical Homophobia, Romantic Angst, Romantic Soulmates, Sherlock Holmes Loves John Watson, Victorian Johnlock - Freeform, sherlock holmes wrote a letter for his john watson
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-12
Updated: 2020-06-12
Packaged: 2021-03-03 22:07:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24672832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lightofonesoul/pseuds/Lightofonesoul
Summary: "My dear Watson,Something truly unbelievable has come to pass, it is madness and defies any sense of reason, and I find no logic, no longer believe in such word..."Sherlock Holmes wrote a letter for John Watson
Relationships: John - Relationship, Sherlock Holmes & John Watson, Sherlock Holmes/John Watson
Comments: 4
Kudos: 54





	My Dear Watson

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to @ImpossibleElement for beta-reading the fic, she’s irreplaceable and amazing💗

italian version, [here](https://efpfanfic.net/viewstory.php?sid=3909876&i=1)

_My dear Watson,_

_Something truly unbelievable has come to pass, it is madness and defies any sense of reason, and I find no logic, no longer believe in such word._

_It is the same ardour which I use to write this letter, since I am yet unable to take this into the deepest part of my being. Do not misinterpret, my friend, I fought, tried my best to achieve it, even going as far as hating this part of my self, but in the end it was futile. Useless to deny this thing that has escaped from my personal Pandora’s box._

_Watson, you once defined me as a calculating machine without sentiment, not interested in feelings in the least, since those were against the rationality that I held above all, and you were right. It is what I also believed, it is the foundation in which I had built my entire being but oh, those notions have fallen to pieces year by year._

_You know, my friend, I must confess that rationality I adored was never part of me, it was only a well-built fortress which protected me for years. The logical thing to do against the world we in which we live._

_I knew I felt emotions, I am human after all, even so I often elevate myself above it to separate me from their stupid behaviour…yet I am sure I do not have to explain this to you, you have always known._

_“This is what I write about you for people to read, of course, but it is not you.” You said to me once, with so brilliant blue eyes._

_You underestimate yourself, my dear Watson, because I can swear only a smart mind and equally clever man could understand others’ souls so well, could see me under my mask of arrogance and presumption._

_So now I must expose to you the truth with this letter, even if you probably will never come to read it._

_Watson, you are aware how my mind is alike a palace with many rooms, full of relevant information for my work. I must say there are new rooms now._

_I never dreamed, thought, or imagined I will find new rooms there, full of feelings and gestures of so importance to me I had to write them in this letter._

_I fear I will never come to understand in depth what is happening, why your gestures and moods, even if most insignificant for other people, are so relevant and important to me! Such as your minute expressions or glances, which hold a privileged place in my mind._

_You know it’s my job to observe people, but you…with you it’s different._

_This began a few years ago, you were an enigma, my dear Watson, so I observed you more and more, as you did and do with me —and honoured me— even if for perhaps reasons different than me own. I was not able to truly understand you, and I must admit this fascinated me._

_This was usual for me, as I said, but with you it was another thing altogether and it grew in intensity. I observed you not only for deduction, but for pleasure and before long I had become obsessed by you, I can tell, and slowly, without control of my mind or emotions, it became important, you became important._

_This was vital for me, to understand your moods even before yourself, I had to know what your deep and wonderful blue eyes said to me._

_In time, an invisible force pushed me to comfort you when a nightmare came to you, or other worries occupied your mind. I composed for you, you know this, but I not only did for your sake, but because I needed to do it._

_I appreciated your company more and more, and caught myself watching you even when I did not want to. To enjoy your face, your happiness —which was able to invade me also— and your eyes, so capable to touch a part of me I never believed possible._

_I loved talking to you, even about the most insignificant of things, because I love when you speak your clever mind and your eyes seek mine._

_I started to like you, find you attractive, despite always thinking such concepts puerile and uninteresting; but with you, my dear John, I cannot control myself. I know the consequences of what I say here, but I assure you this will never come out from my lips. I cannot do this. This century we live in will not forgive this._

_So, for our sake, I must never say this out loud. Only this paper will know what I write with poor words of what I feel with more reality I can say._

_I will never be good at matters of the heart, romance is your area John, and of those romantic books you stubbornly read. This is a sentiment most described, sung and written about from every poet and romantic fool alike, and oh my… I fell in it also. I got caught by this feeling, but I find I wish to be lost against the force which always takes men._

_It’s obvious at this point, and I know you agree with me, but I must write, say and express the flame I can feel burning inside of me. Don’t you find this amusing? Me, waxing poetry and behaving foolishly?_

_My dear John, my conductor of light, I think —for not saying I know— I love you._

_I’m so deeply and completely in love with you._

_This is the truth I must hide even from you, but it is how I feel, John. I must never know the sound of my voice saying it to you, nor the feelings in your face when you hear it…but alas! my beloved, this is our fate in these times._

_I am of the belief in future what happens to you and me, or people like you and I, will be natural and not perceived as perversion of a queer mind. This will be normal. Yet for the moment, I must limit myself from speaking the truth with my lips._

_You are my incomplete melody: a melancholic sound only I hear, and perhaps, one day, in some dream of yours, you will come to hear it too._

_Sincerely yours,_

**_Sherlock Holmes._ **

* * *

Hi to everyone! I always wanted to write a letter from Sherlock POV, so here is it 😊 i love victorian Johnlock with all my soul so i hope i did a good work

I know, the title is trivial but it’s connected with pics i did for the fanfic: they inspired me like fanfiction inspired the pictures😝

You can find them[ here](https://lightofonesoul.tumblr.com/post/619594755585736704/oh-sherlock-holmes-written-a-letter-for-john) and [here.](https://lightofonesoul.tumblr.com/post/620681383969521664/my-dear-watson-lightofonesoul-sherlock-holmes)

I hope you enjoy it! 

And thanks to everyone reading or will left a kudos of feedback ❤ ❤❤


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